Welp, its 2013 folks! Weren't we all supposed to be dead by now? haha ya right. Looking back at least year...It was quite the year. Also looking back at our new years resolutions, we failed. haha ok lie. we acheived some of them. No I did NOT fit into my senior prom dress..maybe because I was too busy being pregnant almost the whole year?..However I did start to build my clientele, and I was actually getting pretty busy at the perfect timing...right when I was leaving to have the babe. But hey, at least I acheived that goal for the most part! I didn't read the whole book of mormon, started to, but pregnant women do not stay up very late. New moms on the other hand?..different story :) As for the soda, I did relatively well! I hadn't had any for a good part of the year, until after I had the baby, I realized how much I loved Dr. Pepper...darn you!. And last but not least I failed miserably with 365 things I'm grateful for. I can blame it on the preganancy brain can't I? hah. Anywho, I secretly knew as I made those goals that I could possibly not meet them all due to me getting pregnant. Man my instincts were good! so are my eggs...(: But I am back at it. Its a new year. I have a completely new life. I'm a new person; and we are a new family. I haven't quite made my new goals for this year. but I plan to make them more realistic and achievable so I dont feel so bad at the beginning of each year. Sunday is my deadline to make them, never to late to start! As for Steven's goals...ummm lets not even go there, he gets an e for effort? or extremely forgetful is more like it.
My new job is probably my favorite. Being a mom. Yes it is the most exhausting and emotional job I've had but I wouldn't change a thing. My little boy will be 3 months next week. 3 months?! I can't believe how fast the time has gone! He has changed every single day and I grow to love him more and more just like my husband. I feel so lucky to be his mom. Steven has been so supportive through everything. He works so hard and I know he misses us everytime he has to leave the house and wishes he could just spend all day with us, and we wish the same! We cherish those days when he doesnt go to work till later or gets off early. I feel bad a lot of the time, that he is the only one working so hard to provide for our family. Before Calvin was born, we had planned on me getting a part time job soon after the delivery. But what we didnt expect was for him to be 3 wks early and spend 2 weeks in the NICU. That changed everything. Money didnt matter anymore, his health was the most important and still is. He is perfectly fine now but being a NICU baby he had more risks of getting sick easier and that would just lead to worse things. So daycare was not an option for us anymore. although I never really loved that idea anyways. I've had 2 job interviews around christmas time. I was SUPER excited about them and felt the interviews went well and everything. The hours worked perfectly the jobs were to my liking and interest, but for one reason or another I didn't get either. It really put a damper on my self esteem. as it would anyone. I started to question. What's wrong with me? I thought it would have worked perfectly? We really could have used this job? Why isn't anything working out? Maybe I'm supposed to be home for calvin? I still don't know the answers to most of these questions. I know that things happen for a reason but sometimes not knowing the reason until later is super hard. As stressful as things have been I wouldn't take any of the time I've been able to spend with my little man. I know SOMETHING will work out one way or another. I just need to have patience, confidence, and faith. I've learned the being mopy around the house all day just makes things worse. So every day I get out of bed and instead of being in pjs all day with Calvin I make sure to get both of us dressed, even if it is something comfy cozy, its not my pjs. I also make sure that I get at least one thing done whether it be laundry, the kitchen or one of the rooms, Something so i feel accomplished and I did something that day. I've been better at making dinner which is huge, because I hardly made dinner before...maybe because I have all day to think about it and prepare it. most of the time. So far these things have worked. and then I have lazy days, which are nice too :)
But if any of you readers...if there are any still out there...that now of a good part time job in salt lake county, please let me know!
peace and blessings..peace and blessings.... :)
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