The NICU experience

Like I mentioned before I was going to write about our experience in the NICU..SO here we go!

Shortly after Calvin was born, I was told he would have to go to the NICU because he was grunting and not breathing well. Of course I was super sad and devastated that they had to take my baby away from me right away after his awaited arrival. But at the same time, I wasn't really worried. I remember thinking, well he is in one piece, he has all 10 fingers and toes, and a beautiful set of hair! what more could a hairdresser ask for?! On top of that the nurses kept reassuring  me he would be just fine numerous times. But I had no emotions at the time, maybe it was all the drugs? haha no I peace knowing that Heavenly Father would take care of our baby boy and what ever happens was meant to be even if I may not have understood it at first. That night I could hardly sleep, partly because I was starving and the other part was because I wanted to hear how Calvin was doing and any updates. I got maybe 2 hrs of sleep that morning?

Early that morning just before breakfast came the NICU Dr came in and said that he was working really hard to breath and that they needed to put him on the ventilator and talked a bunch about a ton of other things it felt like but she concluded that she think he will be just fine, its just up to him on how fast he recovers. She also brought a framed headshot of him as well as the full body shot. I seriously stared at these pictures all morning long. I just wanted to see him! After breakfast we asked the nurses when we were able to go see him, they said oh anytime you want! thanks for telling me! :\ We headed down and he was in the level 3 room. walking in, I felt like I couldn't touch anything or anyone. But the nurses quickly made me feel comfortable and showed me how to touch him and what was going on. They used a bunch of medical terms that were so foreign to me all I wanted to know was if he was making progress and when I could hold him! I seriously asked everyday and visit if I could hold him, but they kept saying no. It was so hard seeing him for the first time with all the tubes and ventilator on. Such a small little human having tubes and needles poked all over his body. The hardest part for me I think was when he would cry with the ventilator, they make no sound because its basically in the vocal chords. Saddest thing to see a baby cry but make not a sound just his red screaming face :( I had my first breakdown that night and bawled me eyes out, I just wanted him to be ok and out of there. All I can say is I am so thankful to have such an amazing and supportive husband who was there right by my side with his shoulder to cry on and encouraging words to calm me down. I had several breakdowns the days following, but thats kind of expected right?!

Well I believe it was the next day, Thursday, we got a new nurse,Nora, at first I wasn't sure about her, I didnt connect with her at the first visit I made with her there. But she then became my favorite nurse in the NICU and was so helpful and supportive each day I came to see him. I had been told by all the nurses that I wasn't able to hold him until the main IV came out of his hand as there are numerous risks of the needle moving and causing other issues which i understood, but I just wanted a few minutes to hold him a little. I prayed every second for the chance to hold him, and Nora was the answer to my prayers. From the second visit I made with her there she explained everything again to me as to what was happening with him and why it happens and went into detail and that is when I really understood what was going on. All I knew from before was just that he was having a hard time breathing, but i never fully understood why that was. She always had a smile on her face, and would take the time to get to know me and talk to me when she could. She gave me hope and the positive energy that was slowly slipping away from me at first. Friday when I was being discharged I went to visit him and bring him my milk before I left and I didn't think this would happen, but I got SO emotional about leaving without him. I knew he was going to be ok, but while I was talking to Nora as I was leaving I go that huge lump in my throat and I tried so so hard to not cry, but the tears just kept filling up in my eyes and she could see it. I then broke down and she gave me a nice big hug telling me he was going to be ok and everything would be fine. (mind you, if you really know me and know I'm not one to be emotional and hug someone for a long period of time especially if I hardly know them..she was special)  She is the one that let me hold Calvin for the first time since birth even though I technically wasn't supposed to according to the other nurses.  From that point on everything got much better.

Eventually the IV came out and I got so excited! We could really hold him for awhile, and not just a few minutes. Later that day when the IV came out he was moved to the Level 1 room. THere were about 10 other babies in this room compared to the last one where there were only about 3 other babies. It was a little overwhelming to see so many babies in there, but also exciting because from here when he gets better he gets to leave the NICU! But i will say from here on out it felt like he was in there forever! I would go everyday after I left the hospital several times a day as much as I could. The nurses I had in recover advised me to take the time to nap while I was at home and he was there. THat was nearly impossible. I did take a good nap when I had gotten home, but I just wanted to hold him all day everyday. Also when he first got into this room he was being bottle fed, and the day I picked up my mom and she met him for the first time was the first time I actually got to feed him myself! I had been pumping and everyday hoping we would get a chance to try breastfeeding mainly because I was so nervous about it and wanted to know how he did. well a few days later he was well enough to try it out, and he did it like a champ! Ok he may not have latched on the right way at first which I didnt know, but I did get lucky with him easily going back and forth from bottle to breastfeeding.I did get mastitis (a breast infection in case you were wondering what that was) that weekend. and I really do not wish this upon anyone. The worst feeling ever. I was so weak with body aches, fever, and chills that caused me to shake uncontrollably so it was hard for me to rest at first. But with some antibiotics, rest, and an awesome mom and hubby to take care of you, I was feeling better  within a few days. Breastfeeding hurt like heck during this time, but like they promised, it got better and better. 

Calvin had good days and bad days in the NICU. There were days where the nurses were hopeful and saying oh well tomorrow bring in the carseat to do the carseat test and we'll go from there. PS. the carseat test is a 2 hr test they have them sit in the carseat and see if they manage to breath easily on their own or with oxygen if they are being sent home on oxygen. also if they tell you to bring in the carseat, that means you get to take him home the next day! As exciting as this can be, it can also make it harder, because there was a time they told us to bring it in and we did and then they said he had to go back on the oxygen and wasn't doing well enough yet. he was in there another week! I loved most nurses in there. Some seemed to careless or seem stuck up? that was mainly at night tho, maybe they were dreading the long overnight shift? who knows, but everyone seemed to be helpful and informational. It was fun to see all the different baby name tags in there. some cute ones and some very interesting ones!  I did get jealous when other babies went home before mine. but needless to say I wanted him to be as healthy as could be so I wouldnt have to worry anymore when he was at home. He got his first bath a few days before he came home, and we got there right as she was wrapping him up. and it was nice to brush his hair and feed a freshly cleaned baby that smelled oh so good. The days were all sort of the same routine. go feed, hold and stare at him forever, and back and forth until the next day. When the day came for him to come home, it didnt seem real. I was actually going to have the life I invisioned with my baby at home happy and healthy! As I look back at this experience, I have to say I am very grateful for the technology we have today. That they were able to tell his lungs were premature and had some fluid in them. That they were able to control his breathing and bring him back to the healthy baby is. Without the NICU team and the amazing knowledge, love and support they give you, I dont know how anyone could get through it. As I'm sure you may have seen on facebook. One of the nurses made all the babies in the NICU an owl hat and took pictures of them in a little tree she had made! How adorable and thoughtful! I dont think I can thank the NICU nurses enough for the time they spend with these babies and care they give them. I definitely dont wish for anyone to have to go through the NICU experience but if you do, know that they are getting the best care and are in the best place for them to get healthy. I'm just happy that i now have a happy healthy baby who I love oh so much :)

A Picture Birth Story

We finally got the pictures from the delivery! 

Here is the birth story via pictures!

Enjoy!

 The boys would watch every single contraction and say "whoa that was a big one!" and see how high the spikes would go.

 

 My support crew...Sister in law and hubby, with our good friend Mark behind the camera of course!

 

 Laughing the night away..

 Ice cup in hand..check!

 We seriously laughed the whole time

 and then it was time to push..

best videographer...so intense

 my sweet nurse that didn't believe me when I said it was time for me to push..:)

Laughing...and..

 Pushing...

 getting ready for the babes...

 "what is everyone staring at?!?"

 unfortunately my Dr. wasn't on call, so Dr. Brown was kind enough to assist me :)

My loving, encouraging hubby saying it was almost over..

 And he was right!

 my...alien?...baby..

 Dad cutting the cord

 so little

 So happy to finally see my baby!

 

 These pictures make me teary eyed still.. NICU team came to work on him..

 ..poor little guy..

 concerned dad...while mom has no clue whats going on..

 meeting each other for the first time

 So in love!

 happy to be holding him!..

 ..until they took him away from me 5 seconds later.. :(

 

And there you have it! We feel so lucky and blessed to have the technology that we do now so that our baby boy could come home with us 2 weeks later happy and healthy! We love him more and more each day and can't believe how much he's grown already since this day! 

Calvin Daniel Crosby - The Birth Story

Three weeks early

October 17, 2012 2:22 am 

Calvin Daniel Crosby was born!

I'll explain the birth story and everything in this post, sorry if its TMI? 

First of all at my 36 week appointment (oct. 9th) Dr. Rappeleye (my obgyn) checked me and discovered that I was 2 cm dilated and 80% effaced. WHOA! I was kinda freakin out at this point, was I really ready to have this baby? I still have so much to do, i havent finished everything! AND my brother was getting married the following weekend in California meaning my mom wouldnt be there! Also I was getting SUPER nervous about the delivery, I didn't want to do it anymore despite how desperately I wanted the baby out and off of my pelvis. The Dr. ordered me to really take it easy and try to keep the little man in for at least 2 weeks ideally. I thought that was going to be impossible. it was SO hard to sit around and hardly do anything. That weekend I had some more contractions, or Braxton Hicks, and cramping and had a few false alarms. Let me tell you, that made it worse! 

I made it a week to my next appointment for my 37 wk check up. He checked me to see that I was dilated to 3 cm and 100% effaced. Well ok, I thought, I guess this guy is gonna come when he wants to and it didn't sound like he was gonna wait another week for mom to get here! The Dr. wasn't thrilled obviously but said I could go into labor any minute now, or my water could break at any time too. At least I was technically full term, but it would be best to keep him in as long as I can. 

I went home coming to terms with the fact that I knew he was coming early and that my mom wouldnt be able to make it, but it was ok because I knew I could do it!

And the Dr. was right. I went into labor that very night the 16th. the time kinda seemed a blurr once I got to the hospital as to when things happened. But I know that evening from 6 to 7 i started getting more contractions, bearable but noticeable for sure. I decided to make sure I had everything ready for the hospital and text steven a heads up in case "this was it". At about 7 or 7:30 my water broke. Although I didnt realize it at first. I kinda felt a "pop", but thought nothing of it. until I felt that "gushing feeling". No its not like in the movies where you are pouring out water all over the place. But I was most definitely leaking. Then soon after that my contractions got worse! I could hardly talk through them or breath. Steven was at work, and I didnt want to make him leave work again (for another false alarm) SO I called my mom of course. She said "dang it you are in labor!" haha I tried to hold out a little bit thinking they would send me home if the contractions weren't that bad. 7:50ish came around and I couldnt do it, I called Steven and the only words I could get out through that contraction was "get home now". He hung up and I guess as he was so excited he ran out of the store and yelled "I'm having a baby". We raced up to the hospital and the whole time I kept telling steven to slow down, and he kept telling me this was the one time that it was actually ok. Luckily we only live maybe 5 minutes away so it was that far. 

Once we arrived and checked in it was just after 8. my contractions were hurting real bad both in front and in my back. They couldnt quite give me the epidural then, becuase they had to fully admit me with the paperwork and what not, so they gave me some medicine that was gonna help but would only last about 45 minutes to an hour. I felt so weird on that stuff, and did not care what was happening. The contractions still hurt but not as bad as they were. Oh and when they checked me I was 31/2 cm dilated and my water for sure broke, there was no doubt about that.

Finally the little asian lady with the good stuff came in. maybe this was around 9:30? This was probably one of the biggest things I was nervous for. The epidural. the idea of a big needle going into your spine and possibly being paralyzed?! ok I didnt really think that would happen to me i was more scared about the whole thing hurting really bad. But with the numbing shot and what medicine I had left in me, I hardly felt a thing. Sure I felt the coolness of the medicine go into my back, but I was just relieved that I could relax and hopefully get some rest. Well about a half an hour rolled by and then an hr and I still was in pain with the contractions. It wasn't working. I started to panic in my mind thinking I would have to go through this whole thing with no choice but to feel everything that was happening. They called my favorite lady back into the room and she gave me another dose. Apparently I was progressing so quickly that they had to give me more epidural. And then, it was wonderful. I was relieved from the stress of my body tensing up every time a contraction came. But I did have to lay and sit in several different positions because his heart rate would drop if I was positioned otherwise. They said he was sunnyside up which was going to make it a whole lot more painful for me and harder as well. Great! The nurse told me at one point that if he didnt move or if his heart rate kept dropping they would do an emergency c-section. Before I ever went into labor I was totally ok with this option if it happened, but at that time when she told me I got a little discouraged or bummed. I wanted to do this. So they ended up putting fluid back in there to see if it would stop his heart rate from dropping. And it seemed to help a little.

  

From this point on I couldnt remember how much time had passed. Maybe an hour she came back and checked me and I was at a 6. My phone was ringing off the hook as well as Stevens. His sister Erica came for support and as well as his good friend Mark who was also our photographer. I'll get some pictures posted once I see them :) We all hung out, watched some ridiculous tv shows that were on way late at night. I hardly remember them because I kept dozing off. She came to check me again and  I was at a 9. I was cruising! I could feel some more pressure down there but she said she would come back in an hour to check me. I was fine, I just kept hitting that button for the epidural :) 

An hour had passed and she still hadnt come to check me, I was sitting up with half of my bed higher than the other, to try to get him to drop more and turn a little bit. I kinda felt like I needed to push, but wasnt quite sure. Steven asked if she could come check me to see if I was right, he came back in the room and said the nurse said she had been watching my contractions and didnt think it was time yet. well I heard and kind of felt this gushing noise. I told Steven to go back and tell her to come in and check me. He told the nurse what happened and she said to the other nurse as he was walking away. "oh these first time dads get so worked up over nothing, I'm sure she has awhile" Well did I prove her wrong on this theory. She finally checked me and then got some things together and said, Ok we are gonna have you start pushing now! I wanted to say, told you! haha but I didnt :) 

I guess Dr Rappeleye, my obgyn, wasnt on call but Dr. Brown was, who was actually at the same office I go to, and have heard nothing but great things about all the Drs. there so I wasnt too worried. So my nurse called Dr. Brown and said I was going to start pushing but it was going to be awhile because of the position he was in and she would let him know when it was closer. Well I gave a few good pushes and she said ok I need you to stop because I'll get in trouble if I deliver another baby on my own. haha Once Dr. Brown finally got in, I was starting to feel my contractions some more, I just wanted this baby out! I gave a few pushes and the Dr ended up cutting me a teensy bit since I had already ripped a little. (thank goodness I didnt feel a thing!) Then I gave one good push and bam! out came my tiny little baby boy at 2:22 am. I couldnt take my eyes off him. I couldnt believe how tiny he was and that I made that in my stomach! Steven cut the cord and they laid him on my stomach while they cleaned him off. 

The worst part of it all was the placenta I think. The Dr. told me not to push but that I would feel tons of pressure. he pulled on the cord that was still attached and pushed super hard on my stomach and out it came. I felt as though I got the wind knocked out of me! And it didnt end there, they kept pushing and pushing to get any extra fluid out of me as well as drain my bladder (boy was i grateful later they did that)

 While I was getting stitched and cleaned up I watched as they checked Calvin out and wrapped him up. He weighed in at 6 lbs 4 oz 18 in long. I couldnt help but think in my head, thats all?! I thought for sure he would be longer maybe a little bigger. Then I hear them say "call Mary tell her to get in here. Call Mary!" I thought, who is Mary and why does she have to be in here, there are plenty of nurses. Well Calvin started to grunt and hardly cry anymore. they tried to get him to cry some more but he kept grunting. As a few of the NICU nurses were working on him the other delivery nurses kept telling me how cute he was and that he was going to be ok. I started to get worried. I wanted to start crying, but I couldnt. I then look over and see my dear husband holding his baby boy for the first time, just staring at him with a smile on his face so in love with him. He finally handed him to me and I got to hold him all of about 10 seconds before they wheeled him away to the NICU. I dont quite remember what they said as to why he had to go to the NICU at that point but something to do with his grunting wasnt normal, and off he went. I didnt know how to feel at that point because I didnt quite understand what was going on and I think I was still in shock at the fact that I just had a baby, and that I was no longer pregnant. Steven and Mark went with Calvin to the NICU and I guess as they were giving him the IV steven almost passed out and he had to sit down and drink some juice. haha Boy was that quite the joke between the nurses every time we went to see him. lol. Erica was so kind to stay with me until they got back and while the nurses gave me some pain meds and some crackers and this delightful juice cocktail thing. Well once I took the pills, nothing wanted to stay inside anymore. yes I indeed threw up luckily I made it into the bucket. boy has it been a long time since that happened and am I glad i doesnt hardly ever happen because I absolutely hate throwing up! 

The boys got back and of course were starving so they went to go grab some food and then Steven would be back to stay with me. It seemed like they had taken forever! I got a cleaned up and in a new gown with those sexy panties that I love oh so much (they actually were quite comfortable) and up I went to my recovery room. It was about 4 by the time I got up there, and all I could think about was how Calvin was doing and when I would be able to see him. also I was STARVING. Steven finally got back and said the only thing that was open was Ihop, man some pancakes sounded so good right about then. But i was left with crackers, and I asked the nurse for some food ANYTHING. she managed to find a turkey sandwhich with chips and jello, and a cookie. yes I ate a turkey sandwhich at 4 in the morning , ok half of it. I finally fell asleep for about 2 hrs? I was woken up to try to pee and take more pain meds as well as the NICU Dr. came to bring me some pictures of Calvin and report that he was struggling and breathing really fast so he was going on a ventilator to help and go from there. I was bummed, I thought he would only be in there for a few days and come home! boy was I wrong. 

Stevens parents decided to drive up that day to be with us Thursday until Sunday. As my mom couldn't come be with me until Monday. We had some great friends come visit us at the hospital and lots of love and support being sent our way via facebook, email, and texts. As for more info on Calvins NICU stay, I'll make another post because this one is getting ridiculously long, I just dont want to forget anything and want to be able to look back and compare from our future children :) 

All in all, my delivery experience wasn't all that bad. about 7 hours of labor, and 20 minutes of pushing? I'll take it! Makes me that more grateful after hearing friends who've spend hours/days in the hospital in labor. I'm just happy at this point our baby boy is healthy and getting stronger each day. We love him so much!

Our favorite hang out

Well, time for a little catch up since my last post. About 2 months ago I went to the hospital for that lovely cyst. Leaving the hospital that day I said I never wanted to go back until this baby was ready to come out. I must have jinxed myself. Exactly a week later we found ourselves back in the ER, this time for Steven. He had been complaining about a stomach ache that morning and he took a bath as I left for work. A few hours passed and I have yet to hear from him which is rare because I always hear from him at about 11 on his way to school. I tried texting, and no responses, I knew something was wrong, I could feel it (early mom instincts?) He called me back what seemed like hours later. He could hardly breath or even talk to tell me he was in pain. Steven NEVER complains about such pain and the only thing i could think of was either super bad acid reflux or his appendix. I left work and had to meet him our church building because he drove there apparently because he had no service at our apartment. I pull up next to him to find him laying all the way down in his chair shirtless, shoeless, with a pair of basketball shorts on. It kinda freaked me out at first but I couldnt help but laugh at the same time. After figuring out where his pain was, I was still unsure what could be causing such grief. What does that mean? go to the ER, just to be safe. we got there about noon. I didnt leave the hospital until MIDNIGHT. after numerous tests and lots and LOTS of waiting for results, Steven has his appendix removed. Weird thing is, the CT scan didnt say it was for sure his appendix but they said it looks like it could be his appendix and that maybe it was the beginning stages of appendicitis. So they gave him the option to take him off the morphine for 12 hrs and see if the pain continues and gets worse, then they would do the surgery, or just do the surgery.   We dont necessarily have that kind of time between school work and army to be waiting around for something that may or may not happen. So of course we decided to proceed with the surgery, and they managed to squeeze us in that night. I wasnt nervous about it until they took us up to another room and we went into the prep room for him to meet his "new best friend" who would knock him out for the surgery. The surgery only took 25 minutes, but it seemed like forever! I was the only one in the waiting room until my lovely sister in law brought my oh so pregnant self some soup and bread for dinner. (what would we do without family?) He finally came out of surgery and was super slap happy about everything. here are a few of my favorites. when we met him in the elevator to go up to his recovery room, he told his nurse "she was pretty easy to find huh. cuz she was the prettiest one out there!" haha ya i was the only one out there. he was also starving before surgery and begged for food all day and asked for me to bring him cookies after surgery. which he cant have. but when we got to the room he asked his nurse, can i have some cookies? when she told him no just ice and water first he growled at her. hah! we were all dying. Oh and on our way to his room in the hall he said " he nurse can we go through the drive thru?" and as the nurse went along and said ya if anything is open he quickly responds " wendy's is always open late!" haha this guy was killing me. there are a million other things he said that I could go on and on but I won't waste any more of your time :) He recovered really well. although he and I had a hard time with him not being able to lift anything for 3 weeks and no heavy activity. I'm just glad he had this done way before I went into labor and we were both down. that would have been horrible! But as of today he is perfectly fine and healthy, and no worries of him getting appendicitis. :) And without further a due, here is Mr Steven Crosby feelin good on his morphine!
                               
 (doesnt he look great in a gown?) hehe

First Timer

Yup, as some of you may or may not know, I was in the ER last Tuesday and it was my first time going there for myself. Let me tell you I hope I never have to do that again. My stomach was nauseous from the fact that I had to be there, and seeing some of the people there in the waiting room or that came in didn't ease the sickness either.  I had just gotten back from Cali the night before after a miserable 10 hr drive and didn't expect to end up here. For about a week before my regular OB apt that Tuesday morning, I had been experiencing horrible pain near my tailbone, and I thought oh its just the baby pushing on the tailbone and it was a part of the whole being pregnant deal. I could hardly walk, sitting down was miserable even though that is all you want to do being pregnant, and sleeping was pretty much non existent with first being prego and trying to get comfortable and two the excruciating pain I had when I tried to roll over from side to side, with out rolling on my back.  I thought I was going to die if it was going to be like this for the rest of the pregnancy, Tylenol did absolutely nothing but maybe ease the pain a little bit for me to be able to interact with family without looking miserable.
Well, as I go to my scheduled 2 wk follow up appointment with my obgyn, I cringed as I tried to sit on the bed they have to check your belly and the baby's heartbeat. I immediately told him I couldn't lay on my back and he proceeded to lay me on my side somewhat and do the regular routine then had me flip over to look at my tailbone. Without any hesitation he said I needed to go straight to the ER from here because I had a cyst that needed to be drained or removed. I wanted to burst into tears because that was the last thing i wanted to hear, I was expecting him to say, well that's just apart of being pregnant and here is some medicine to help with the pain. All I can say is I am SO glad my mom was with me, otherwise I would have had to go by myself until Steven got there after class. We waited for about an hr in the waiting room and I was getting so antsy trying to sit still, I just wanted it to be over with. I went up to ask how much longer and she said there were no more beds, but then called me up about 5 min later to say they didn't realize I had been there for so long and they were taking me back. Hooray. I got dressed in the beautiful hospital gown and anxiously waited for the Dr. to tell me what was going to happen. The nurse was really nice and that definitely helped. Well it turns out that I had a Pilonidal cyst that was about a half a golf ball size, ouch, and it needed to be drained which meant, they had to give me a numbing shot (which turned out to be one of the worst parts) then they would cut open the cyst and let it drain and pack it with cotton afterwards to keep it open and prevent the cut from healing on the outside and then building up again on the inside. They did give me some pain meds for the pain afterwards as well as antibiotics and said I had to come back in 2 days to take out the cotton and see what to do next. ughh I thought I was done. It did feel better later that day but I was still super sore and very slow to move. (again thank goodness for mom!) The dreadful Thursday rolled around and we went back to the er, luckily went right into the room, and the Dr looked at it and took out the cotton, so fun, and told me i might need surgery or to meet with a specialist. Luckily that Dr was there that day and was aware of my case from the previous Dr on Tuesday, and wanted to see me right away. Oh yes i walked across the hospital in my gown, feeling super awkward and met with the surgeon/specialist. Luckily the good news comes and after poking me with a few q-tips almost bringing me to tears, he said he didn't want to do surgery since i was so far along pregnant and that he thought I would be fine with the antibiotics and keeping the area open. wait what?!  My lucky husband gets to open my wound each day with a q-tip and peroxide to clean it. Lovely.
 Now for those of you who don't know what this type of cyst is (because I didn't) its gross. and it can happen to anyone, but I was the lucky winner to get it while pregnant. I would never wish this upon anyone. Needless to say, as of today, I haven't taken any Tylenol or anything for pain and its been manageable. I'm thankful for my wonderful mother who was here to help take care of my and set up our apartment more after we just moved in, and also my husband who has been right by my side if I need anything and is always asking how I'm doing. Now that i have written a novel, I should probably stop, but if I didn't write this experience down somewhere I know I would forget..ok maybe not.

CA Baby Shower

Last weekend I went home to my parents house for one last visit and also for a baby shower with all my friends and family in Cali. The shower was beautiful with delicious food, good company and of course adorable decorations! It was so great to see most of my family and friends and most of all just be at home :) Thanks to everyone who came to the shower and for the gifts to help us on our new adventure! Here are some pictures from the shower, I should have taken more, but it was a little crazy that day, and also having a prego brain doesnt help!

To Be Continued...

Welp. Of course right when I feel like I'm getting my house and everything in order, and making time for everything, including updating my blog, something happens to destroy it all! Well here's a little (maybe not so little) explanation as to why I havent posted or finished revamping our blog lately.

We were planning on staying here in our cute little townhouse (its really not cute on the outside, but the inside I feel I did a pretty good job of fixing up!) for at least another year and then either prepare to buy a house or move elsewhere. It seemed when I first found this place, it was a miracle because everywhere that I had looked seemed to be super small for a ridiculous price, or super trashy and ghetto. Now we do live in a neighborhood that can be scary, but honestly I have been perfectly safe and fine here despite what others may think of it. In our ward, we have 13 different nationalities, 13! insane, but it has been awesome. So as we go in to the office to our complex to sign our new lease, we come to find out that they are raising the rent by $100! AND it could possibly go up even more. At first we kind of just took it and started filling out some application paperwork for the renewal and after we left, it hit us. UM we can't afford this with a brand new baby on the way and me not working real soon! I panicked for a quick second (or two) and we came to the conclusion we need to move asap! we call the office back and tell them we will do month to month until we can find a place, well another slap in the face its an extra $100 to do month to month! what the?! Immediately I started looking on craigslist and KSL for new apartments in areas we originally never thought we would want to live in because we tried to stay closer to the U. I had a list of about 3 places to go check out the next day after I got off work. The first one was a HUGE fail! I couldnt even walk into the whole apartment because the smell of the smoke was soo bad! I started to get discouraged, the next place was nice and clean, and had some better features our current place didnt have but it was a bit pricier than we were shooting for. On my way to the last place,  I drove past a complex I recognized online but didn't have time to look into details about it, I felt the urge to flip around and check it out, why not I was right there. So I did and this ended up being the place we are moving into! The floorplan is so nice and open! We can actually have parties at our place with out people sitting on top of each other! haha. When everything seemed to be tumbling down for weeks, It is now all coming back together. Things fell into place just perfectly. The only downside is we can't move in until the 8th of sept, and we asked our current place if we can pay a prorated amount until we can move in, and nope, we have to pay half months rent! Forget that! Steven was so kind as to find a storage unit since my brain was fried from scouring the internet for a new home, and it turns out the first months rent is free! So we only had to pay the admin fee! For the week or so that we cant move in we will stay with some kind friends of ours :)
I'll actually be flying home to Cali to stay with my parents for a few days and have a baby shower there while Steven gets to move everything in! haha I feel bad, but I cant really help move anything anyways (which is absolutely killing me as I'm trying to pack!) We are hoping to move in a little bit sooner, if they finish the apartment, but as of right now thats the date. So all my friends out there with their studly muscular husbands...If you aren't doing anything within the next couple weeks, we would love your help!

SOO until then, my internet will most likely be down for a few weeks until we get everything moved and set up again. boo! My updating will be continued afterwards, I PROMISE! I will have lots more time because I wont be working as much. This little boy is getting harder to lug around at work these days. But I am loving the feeling of him moving around so much :)

Cars, Dirt, & Mischeive

Yep. These three words are what come to mind when I think about boys. We found out back on May 31st that this little alien of a child is indeed a BOY! Yes we did find out early, I couldn't stand it, so we went to fetal fotos. It was such an amazing experience seeing our baby boy for the very first time looking like an actual infant instead of a jelly bean. Here was our announcement to the world on instagram and facebook, as most of you may have seen :)

 

Steven was very quiet in the ultrasound. I was kind of nervous, did he not want a boy? is this making him more nervous? what was going through that boys head?! but then again, you never know what he's thinking sometimes:) Later he explained he was definitely overwhelmed with the fact that he is going to have a son that will look up to him, that he will bond with and teach as he gets older. But as the day went on he got more excited of course that he had someone to watch his Star Wars and Indiana Jones movies with..(yeah I'm not the biggest fan of either). I'm excited to have a boy, because I hear boys especially love their mommies :) 

 Since then, I am now 26 wks. and boy is my tummy growing. This little man is an active one. Which I am grateful for, except for when I'm trying to go to bed. It's cute to see Stevens face each time he kicks and he can either see or feel it, he gets so excited! Benji our current furry child, had his head on my tummy on the couch, and Baby C gave him a good kick, which indeed freaked Benji out a little. (which actually was quite hilarious). We have about 3 months left, which seems so crazy to me, it sometimes sounds like forever but I know it will be here before I know it. As for right now, I'm getting more and more excited as we are getting things from grandmas and grandmas and relatives on top of things for his nursery. My mom is amazing and already finished his bedding!(a little excited?:]) She also has our crib that she is refinishing and we are refinishing an old dresser that has been passed down in the family. I will post in my Home Projects page as I gather pictures and complete the room.

Other than that, Baby C is doing great and we are both happy and healthy.
We'll keep you updated as time goes by!

Much Love♥
 

March 9th..a special day

March 9th turns out to be a great day no matter what the year is here in the Crosby household! In March 2009 our first date fell on this date, and from there is when we fell madly in love with each other. March 2012 is the day we found out we are expecting, and started falling in love with the idea of becoming parents! It's still so crazy to us that we are actually going to have a baby! Now that I am at 15 wks its getting more and more real that there is actually a little alien of a baby moving around and growing inside of me. I've definitely felt the little flutters of the baby moving and its so exciting every time! I've had such a wonderful pregnancy so far. I only got sick ONCE in my first trimester, and just had the constant nausea all day long. That was such a pain because nothing sounded good, but I knew I had to eat. Since I was about 11/12 weeks I have been feeling great. No more constant nausea and need to sleep. I still get tired don't get me wrong, but nothing like before! I'm trying to take advantage of my daily naps when I can :) which is so weird for me because I NEVER was a napper before, but now I cherish them. As for cravings, nothing really weird like some people, ive heard pb&J with Mayo...gross! Mine is just random, if something sounds good, I'll be fixed on eating that or something similar. We are able to find out the sex of the baby this week and I'm getting soo anxious! So take your poll, Boy or Girl?!? Right now it seems to be girl season, Steven and I will be happy with either, just as long as its healthy :)

This is the way I told Steven I was pregnant. It killed me because I found out at home alone before I went back to work and he was gone. On my way home I picked up this book and had it wrapped. He didn't quite get it at first...maybe its his add? haha But then I asked him if he got it and told him I was pregnant. I tried to video tape it so we could announce it that way, but I didnt realize i didnt push record on my phone. His face was priceless. It was a look of all emotions, excitement, nervousness, and disbelief. He asked me a million times really? really? are you serious? He was super quiet for a long time, and that scared me a little, but he was just trying to take it all in because of how fast it happened. Needless to say, he is getting more and more excited everyday and makes sure I know that :) He's such a good husband and will be an even better dad.

As most of you may have seen on Facebook when we announced it to everyone. I tried to be creative with it and do something different than the can of prego spaghetti sauce that everyone else was doing. We went to color me mine, and I made this cute bowl :)



Well I think thats all for now! OH, as of right now, my estimated due date is November 20th.!

Much Love♥

We are weird.

Yes.
Its true.
Steven and I are weird.
We have a goofy relationship sometimes.
I was thinking about it today and almost everytime
we go out together I think to myself (nacho voice) people must
think we are SO weird. I concur. So..here are some words that I think
describe my little family best.

affectionate
ambitious
anxious
artistic
charismatic
creative
courageous
dependable
gregarious
intelligent
industrious
joyful
sociable
sympathetic
talkative
easy-going
friendly
funny
generous
honest
lazy
lucky
loud (steven)
neat
polite
silly
curious
caring
enthusiastic
faithful
manic
scatty

Welp. There ya have it.
I love our life together and wouldn't change a thing.
XoXoXXooxxOO

In Between.

Heres to catch up in between christmas and now. For New Years we were able to go down to Southern Cali to Stevens house and spend it with all of his family. We absolutely LOVED it! As the days went by, we didn't want to leave! It was beautiful weather, and so much fun spending time with all of our adorable nieces and nephews. I got quite a few videos on my phone, they were so entertaining and we love them all to pieces! We just wish we could see them more often :/
Heres a little snip of the fun we had with these kiddos!

We visited with Grandpa Don, who unfortunately has Alzheimers :/...but hes still just as hilarious as ever and loves every woman that comes to visit him.

We <3 you Grandpa Don!
I love my in-laws, and am so lucky to have them apart of my life now! It's always a party with the Crosbys!
Lil' Noah James is getting so big!
The twins have always loved Steven and he happens to be the jungle gym whenever they are around ;)
I can't wait until these kids get older, I've got so many fun videos to show their girlfriends and boyfriends ;) heheh.
So for New Years Eve, we were going to have a party with some games watching the infamous ball drop on tv...but due to other events that occurred earlier in the week, everyone was exhausted and wanted a low key night home. So Dan, Sonia, Steven and I went to see the new Sherlock Holmes movie and kissed each other at midnight :)
Since we've been back from our mini vaca...It was back to the daily grind. work school work work work. haha Well things have changed up a bit! Steven is now doing ROTC through the U...Guess we are gonna be a Ute fan! don't worry we dont hate on BYU ;) He also got an awesome scholarship through ROTC and is going to be contracting officially any day now! Which is a HUGE relief and weight off our shoulders! Also Steven just got a part-time job at Whole Foods! and one of the best things is we get a 20% discount there! hello new grocery store! haha. He's working in the bakery and he just informed me he baked so many blueberry muffins today...yumm! As for his schooling, hes still at SLCC, just finishing up this last semester and hopefully transferring to the U next semester. He just barely changed his major to Spanish...why you may ask? well one both of our families speak spanish and it would be very beneficial, and two he's actually looking to go into the FBI for his career! We are very excited and understand at the same time it is a very rigorous and hard process, but we know it will be great if things fall into place.
As far as my schedule? For awhile now I've been basically working 3 jobs..shhya..killer! So as you may or may not know, I've been working part time at Macy's at the Clinique counter. Also I assist at Taylor D' Shaw salon part time. Just recently, December, I started booth renting at the salon doing hair part time as well! So pretty much its 3 part time jobs. working about 50-60 hrs a week. I thought I could be superwoman and handle it...but it wore on me real quick! I just wasnt happy. I absolutely LOVE my salon and the people I work with! So that was out of the question to leave this place. So alot of my stress I realize was from Macy's. I love my co-workers and the education i received working at clinique, but retail is all about numbers, numbers, numbers! and since i was there at odd hrs, it wasn't making any money..so this is actually my last week. Its bittersweet. But I will admit I am SO happy and thrilled. I've basically been living at the salon lately...and it really doesnt bother me as much as I thought. yes i have days where I know I can be doing things at home, but I am determined to build my clientele and the only way to do that is to put in what I want to receive. So If your in Utah, and you need your hair done...Let me know! I'm always up for anything :)
So there ya have it. things are moving...slowly but surely!now that I'll have more time, I hope to be able to update this thing more. Also I'm determined to get my butt into shape! I'm gonna be ready for bikini season!...err...tankini season? haha
well thats all for tonight folks.
Stay classy!
much love<3